Reflecting on the Evolution of One’s Kink

kinkywriter Blog

Sometimes it’s intriguing to me to look back at how my interests in all of this have changed over the years…

Case in point – if you had told me a couple of years ago that there would be a time when I would actually consider cuckolding to be a turn-on, I’d have told you that you’re fucking nuts!

Nowadays, though, I guess you could say that things have changed a little. 😉

A similar thing actually happened with one of my earliest fetishes – nipple play – too. I still remember the very first time I experimented with it using a pair of ordinary, wooden clothespins, and even though the end result was quite successful, I also remember swearing vehemently afterwards that I’d never do it again because my nipples just hurt so damn much – I didn’t understand how anybody could actually get off on that, much less why I got off on it.

Fast-forward to today, ironically, and I’m a complete nipple slut … some of my best orgasms come from just absolutely going to town on these little nubs … and those ordinary, wooden clothespins? Actually pretty tame once you’ve become accustomed to some of the more severe toys that have been concocted for folks like me!

I think it can be interesting every once in a while to look back on all of those things and see how something that was very much a turnoff (or even simply a non-interest) a couple of years ago eventually evolved to be a contributing factor to my kink repertoire as a whole these days. And while I’m not necessarily going to put dates beside them and give away too many juicy details, I think I could still make a pretty accurate chronological list today of the subjects that have peaked my interest over the years and how they transitioned into each other over time…

  • Fetish Clothing – Probably my very first exposure to kink … I enjoyed looking at a woman in a sleek corset or a pair of leather pants more than if she was actually naked!
  • Crossdressing – This was a strange time in my life and doesn’t hold a huge attraction today, but I suppose you could say that I found a thrill in mimicking what I didn’t have in my own life.
  • Self Bondage – My first bondage-related interests were actually in self bondage … namely because it was the kind of thing that you could do all by yourself.
  • Bondage – And once my social life began to pick up a bit, the obvious appeal of having somebody else tie you up was kind of a given!
  • Boots – Likewise, this is when I began to develop a deep fascination for ladies boots because, I don’t know – I guess there’s just something about ‘em…
  • Female Domination – Eventually the physical domination (i.e. bondage restraints) somewhat gave away to the more psychological approach between a dominant and her submissive…
  • Chastity – …which gave way to chastity as an opportunity for greater control
  • Humiliation – …and then a bit of humiliation as another domination tool – at least in certain settings
  • Cuckolding – …and finally cuckolding – yet another step down the road of domination and humiliation, and frankly one that I’m still trying to figure out today!

You can see in a lot of cases where one kind of built upon its predecessor, and it’s not like (most of them) did any sort of fading away to make room for my latest fascinations … that’s why I kind of like the word evolution because it’s pretty clear that it’s all been part of a bigger path of my own personal growth over time. The latter probably would’ve never appealed to be without the former, each like building blocks serving to form my kink pyramid, if we want to steal a concept from the children’s toys of yesterday!

If anything, I guess you could say that it makes me a little curious as to what my next building block might end up being, which is hard to predict because I’d like to think that I’ve become pretty well versed in at least most of the options throughout the various kink avenues … and yet when I look back over the list above, there are certainly a fair number of those that I don’t think I ever could’ve predicted until I was finally in the moment and discovering that appeal for the very first time.

But you know what? That’s kind of fun, too – branching out and exploring new things and uncovering hidden passions that you didn’t even know you had in you. There’s certainly no shortage of self-discovery when it comes to kink – you just have to keep an open mind, never stop trying new things, and always give yourself the freedom to evolve when you stumble across something that you kind of like, even though you don’t entirely understand why just yet!  😀